搞笑的英文个性签名
1、我觉得地球好危险，我想火星了。
I think the earth is so dangerous. I think Mars is here.
2、车道山前必有路，有路我也刹不住。
There must be a road in front of the driveway, and there is a road I can not brake.
3、闻一闻无晒精神，索一索无晒知觉。
Smell, no sun spirit, a cable without sun perception.
4、你快回来，我一人忽悠不来！
You're coming back, I can't fool!
5、本人债主众多，人际关系广泛。
I have many creditors and extensive connections.
6、行路似只猫，唔使打大架。
Walk like a cat, I hit the trail.
7、昨天看你一眼，现在眼还疼呢。
I saw you yesterday. Now my eyes still hurt.
8、爱一个人好难，放弃一个人真简单。
It's so hard to love someone. It's so easy to give up.
9、人是猴变的，哪有不贱的。
Man is a monkey, and there is no cheap.
10、不懂的最高境界，是两个字：装懂！
Do not understand the highest realm, is two words: pretend to understand!
11、每天过着猪的生活却羡慕狗的身材。
Pig life every day, but envy the dog's figure.
12、放荡总在自慰前，纯洁总在手淫后。
Debauchery always before masturbation, purity always after masturbation.
13、中指是现代社会不能少的手语之一。
Middle finger is one of the few sign languages in modern society.
14、我们手拉手，一起闪亮到世界尽头。
We hand in hand, together flashing to the end of the world.
15、手拿菜刀砍电线，一路火花带闪电。
With a kitchen knife, a wire, a band of sparks, a flash of lightning.
16、妈妈说世界上没有后悔药只有老鼠药。
Mother said there was no regret in the world, only the mouse medicine.
17、不用问我想吃什么，有什么吃什么。
Don't ask me what I want to eat and what to eat.
18、都说姐漂亮，其实都是妆出来的。
They all say that they are beautiful, but they are all made up by makeup.
19、说不出你哪里好，就是想看你洗澡。
I can't tell you where you are, but I want to see you take a shower.
20、没什么事不要找我，有事更不用找我。
There's nothing to do. Don't look for me.
21、出来混，老婆迟早是要换的！
Out of mixing, sooner or later the wife is to change!
22、我喜欢在睡觉前想些不可能实现的事。
I like to think about things that are impossible before I go to bed.
23、发丝也藏了爱你的神经。
And the hair hides the nerve that loves you.
24、红杏不出墙，坚决拽出来。
Energy-saving, resolutely pulled out.
25、最平凡的爱，最让人依赖。
The most ordinary love, the most dependent.
26、我视金钱为粪土，我爸视我为化粪池。
My money is dirt, my Dad see me as a septic tank.
27、每次吵完架都觉得自己没有发挥好。
Every time I quarrel, I feel I have not played well.
28、水清则无鱼，人贱则无敌。
There is no fish without water, but no man is cheap.
29、世上男人千千万，姐要不爽天天换。
There are millions of men in the world.
30、泼妇总是出此刻公共场所耍二百五。
Bitch is always playing two hundred and fifty public places at the moment.
31、骗自己成全他，根本没那么伟大。
Cheat yourself, help him, not so great.
32、甜言蜜语听多了会导致糖尿病。
Too much sweet talk can lead to diabetes.
33、我忍屎忍尿也忍不下你呀。
I can't bear the urine, and I can't stand you.
34、长痘没什么，那是你可爱的冒泡。
It's nothing. It's your lovely bubble.
35、如果不能美得惊人，那就丑得勾魂吧！
If not beautiful, the ugly soul!
36、我现在拿得起放不下的只有筷子。
I can't afford it now, only chopsticks.
37、今年过节不收礼，收礼只收火车票。
This year's holiday gifts, gifts received only a train ticket.
38、先下手遭殃，后下手更遭殃。
He who takes the first takes the worse.
39、天真岁月不忍欺，青春荒唐不负你。
Naive years can not bear to deceive, youth absurd you.
40、我最大的缺点，就是缺点钱。
My greatest weakness is weakness.
41、明月几时有，自己抬头瞅。
When the bright moon, and look up at yourself.
42、有的时候、睡觉也是一种享受。
Sometimes, sleep is also a kind of enjoyment.
43、你就像条哈巴狗，谁有吃的跟谁走。
You like a bulldog, who eat and who go.
44、通常不敢公开秀恩爱都是不爱有备胎。
Usually do not dare to openly show affection, do not love the spare tire.
45、今天忘了吃药，吓坏了小伙伴。
Today, forgetting to take the medicine scared my little buddy.
46、自从得了精神病，我的精神就好多了！
I've been much better since I got psychotic!
47、一个人要多贱才能够配得上迩。
A person wants much cheap ability to be able to be worthy of you.
48、所谓思念，只是一个人的一厢情愿。
The so-called miss, just a person's wishful thinking.
49、我说过我爱你，但没说我只爱你。
I said I love you, but I didn't say I love you.
50、水至清则无鱼，人至贱则无敌。
There is no fish without water, but no man is cheap.
51、幸福的日子：就是吃饱了撑著去睡觉。
Happy days: when you are full, go to sleep.
52、严重怀疑月老把我红绳拿去织秋裤了。
I have serious doubts about the red rope to matchmaker woven Long Johns.
53、你那么讨人喜欢，叫我怎么不爱你。
How can you not love me when you're so cute?.
54、闭上眼睛，我看到了我的前途。
Close your eyes, I see my future.
55、冬天来了，我不小心把棉被洗了。
Winter came, and I washed the quilt carelessly.
56、不要总是卧槽卧槽的，有本事反过来。
Do not always lie in the groove, there is the ability to reverse.
57、男人靠的住，母猪能上树。
If a man lives on, a sow can climb a tree.
58、老娘变天鹅的时候，你还是个蛋呢。
When I become a swan, or your eggs.
59、师太！你就从了老衲吧！
Shitai! From the Laona you!
60、琴棋书画不会，洗衣做饭嫌累。
Not too tired to cook fancies of men of letters.
61、都怪自己太年轻，是人是狗没分清。
Blame yourself too young, is a dog is not clear.
62、废话是人际关系的第一句。
Nonsense is the first sentence of interpersonal relationship.
63、做一道多选题，但是答案都是迩。
Do a lot of topics, but the answers are all near you.
64、你所在的城是我思念的源泉。
Your city is the source of my longing.
65、分享是一种美德，送人玫瑰手留余香！
Sharing is a virtue, give the rose fragrance in hand!
66、咳！该说的说，不该说的小声说。
Cough! What should be said should not be whispered.
67、今夜，让我们用冷战取暖！
Tonight, let's warm up with the cold war!
68、他人笑我穿得厚，我笑他人冻得透。
Others laugh at me, I wear thick, I laugh, others cold enough.
69、你能否把心腾干净只装下我一个人。
Can you make your heart clean and just leave me alone?.
70、天生庸材亦有用，捱你唔死一世穷。
Natural mediocrity is useful, too.
71、名花虽有主，我来松松土。
Though Lord, I to loosen the soil.
72、一巴掌把你打到墙上扣都扣不下来。
One slap hits you on the wall and the buttons don't button.
73、有一瞬间想过，要好好学习。
For a moment, think about it and study hard.
74、要适当吃一点励志网http://wWw.qqZf.cN/，才有力气减肥。
To eat a little bit, just have the strength to lose weight.
75、念了十几年书，还是幼儿园比较好混。
Read more than ten years of books, or kindergarten is better mix.
76、我都不泡你了，你又何苦泡我。
I do not bubble you, why do you have my bubble.
77、情话很美，连外人都跟着流泪。
Love words are beautiful, even strangers follow tears.
78、作业我们分手吧，我们真的不适合。
Let's break up. We're really out of place.
79、绑不住我的心就不好说我花心！
Can not tie my heart, I do not say that the heart!
80、人生自古谁无死，早死晚死都得死。
Since ancient times, no one died, die young, die late.
本文地址：搞笑的英文个性签名http://www.qqzf.cn/lizhi71677/